Kyanosa stood up, brushed himself off, and took stock of his current situtation. He was currently completely lost in the middle of a vast plain that seemd to stretch for miles in all directions. He was accompanied by something that looked like a human with a tail, a bright blue dog, and a ghost that used to be a talking kite attached to the end of his seemingly useless red-and-white striped umbrella. Earthquakes were periodically knocking the whole group to the ground and random fireworks had appeared a good ways off to his left. As if that weren't enough, some insanely evil and (we're assuming) powerful British guy was apparently about to tear the planet itself to shreds.
Rock on.
He ripped the flowers from the end of the umbrella and tossed them aside. "That was so not in the game. Then again, neither were you guys." He looked at them. Adrian stared at the ghost, seemingly debating how to respond to what he had just said about some round guy. Optional stared at all of them and, with Kyanosa's luck, debated what to become to kill the lot of them. Gelid stared at the ground. He didn't seem like a talkative fellow anyway.
"Could you take us at least to where the agent was?" Adrian broke the silence, during which Kyanosa has begun beating the umbrella against the ground.
"I can do that. What method of transport would you prefer? Airplane? Ground vehicle?"
"How about you become a few more umbrellas and we all float our way over?" Kyanosa got more funny looks. Looking at Optional, he inquired "Can you turn into absolutely anything?"
"Anything that is not alive."
"Can you become their sense of humor?" He pointed at the others.
"Dead, not nonexistent."
"Harsh. I like him." He looked back to the others grinning, only to see that all-too-familiar look that usually means, 'I'm going to rip you a new nostril.' "Now become something behind which I can hide."
Another quake shook the plain, but this time everybody Kyanosa and Adrian knew how to handle it with more dignity. Only he fell over, but it was after a good struggle.
Still floating, Optional asked, "What's so important about this agent?"
"He probably knows what's going on here better than anybody else." Adrian nodded a few times, deep in thought. (To this day, nobody knows what she was debating in her head. Go see the knowledgeable agent or stay and wander with the new guy from First Earth? Not a difficult choice.)
"Wait a minute!" Kyanosa stood back up, fell over, and stood up again. "You're new; I haven't been able to give you the standard inquisition. How many evil guys are buzzing around this planet?"
Optional...well, shimmered. Probably the ghost equivalent of blinking. "Last I checked, seven or eight, in two groups."
"Gnarly. How many are British?"
Another shimmer, then he started turning into various colored rocks. "None of them, I think."
"You sure? None named...hang on." He reopened his handy dandy (yellow) notebook. "None named Sir Pseudo Havering?" The rock fell over with an audible thud. "That's a yes?"
"You must be new here. Havering is one of the more powerful beings in the history of the mulitverse. He has a few cronies named Anubarik, Necromius, and Ratch Havoc."
Kyanosa mumbled something about finding a Pen marble, but eventually put the notebook away and resorted to memory. "At least now we're getting somewhere. Now, where can I meet them all?"
"That would be a bad idea."
"Hey, I have to get into the swing of things here somehow. If I have to spend another few hours alone with these guys, I might just hang myself with the umbrella hook." He tapped it on the ground and watched as it flopped open. "That explains it." He swung it over his shoulder. "Now, are we gonna see the round guy or go get killed? Or eat?" He thought for another second, then pointed the now-open umbrella at the dog. "You've been awfully quiet. What do you say? What does everybody do next?"